AWOL

Government budget cuts? I abhor fiscal violence. #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.net

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As a child, I was forced to walk the plank. We couldn’t afford a dog. Where does a horse go when it gets sick? To the horse-pital Global warming will kill every single person on this planet It’s a good thing I’m married. I asked my wife, “Do you think the cup is half full...

Baseball is a team effort. Especially the bullpen. Everyone has to pitch inning. #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.net

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What gets burning hot right before it freezes? A laptop. What do you call a Chinese kid who was born too early? spoiler. Wong Tai Ming. What do you call a Southern kid who was born prematurely? Earl Lee. And one who was born late? Tuk Tu Long. I got arrested today for walking out...

Guy walks into bar, pulling on a long chain.The bartender asks him, “You come in here everyday pulling that chain, why?”The guy replies, “You ever tried to push one?” #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.net

I will really miss being able to walk if my legs get amputatedIt’s a case of a motional attachment. #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.net

I went skydiving today for the first time.This guy strapped himself to me, we jumped out of the plane.As we plummeted he said, “So how long have you been an instructor?” #joke #short Read more on page https://jokesoftheday.net

My local supermarket is exchanging old novels for certain root vegetables. That’s a turnip for the books. Apparently you can’t use beefstew as a password… It ain’t stroganoff! Someone stole my broken calculator, but I don’t know why. It just doesn’t add up. When I was a boy, “The Jetsons” gave me unrealistic expectations about...